Scoop on poop

OK, so ya want the scoop on the poop?

This wedding stuff, for my SIL, is really starting to get to DH and I. There are so many facets to it that I won't be able to get into all of it in one post. But the one that has been on our nerves the most, I will touch on here.

So Miss J is going to be the flower girl for the wedding. How sweet, that is going to be nice to see this bubbly little 21 month (when the wedding occurs) girl hopefully dropping rose petals down the aisle in her beautiful white satin dress.

No problem there.

The problem gets irritating when the question comes up whether my mom and her husband are going to stay with Miss J and eat at the reception.

#1 My mom and husband really don't do weddings, or showers, or anything foo fooey of the liking. I had a very difficult time trying to get my mom into the swing of things for my wedding and to be the mother of the bride. She handled it quite well I will add, but still was not all about nor did she understand the reason behind the "big deal". She never had a wedding of her own. My parents got married at the JP and her current husband and her did the same thing. So no showers, no white gown, no wasted money spent on a few hours of the day. Nor did she have a baby shower or any friends to "throw" her a shower when I was born. They were poor, she made my clothes, used cloth diapers, and I even think my dad built my crib out of dowels and 1x4's. Yeah, talk about the simple life.

#2 Miss J will most likely be so overstimulated from the day that by 6pm, when the reception begins she will either be so wired and fussy or be ready to crash. Not to mention, by the time dinner even starts, will probably be 7pm, then at least 1 to 1-1/2 hours for dinner...she would NEVER make it. She eats in less than a 1/2 hour. And if by some miracle she did make it through the dinner, it would most likely be mom and dad attending to her every little whine and need and not to be selfish by any means...but we would kind of like to enjoy the wedding ourselves. Not be attending to the every need of Miss J and trying to keep her from throwing a fit or crying a storm.

#3 Why should the bride and groom pay for 2 1/2 extra meals when the odds are they won't be staying any way. I mean seriously...

So we have been going back and forth with my SIL and MIL about this issue for MONTHS!!! And just when we think they get the whole reason why it is probably not a good idea to have Miss J at the reception...they start to play dumb and ask why it is not a good idea.

So we explain it to them all over again, and again, and again.

So I finally asked my MIL if there was some reason that SIL REALLY wanted to have my mom, her husband, and Miss J so badly at the reception. Was there some sentimental reason? I know there are some things that a bride just really won't budge on for their wedding. There were things at mine (no cheesy elevator music during dinner...all Frank Sinatra type music ONLY). And if this was one of those things...than we will do everything we can to honor it...But she tells me no, not really. "She just thinks it would be nice to have her niece at the reception."

OK, Maybe if she were 5 or 6 years old. And she would play with the ring bearer and other flower girl who are of that age all evening and when they get tired you can just push two chairs together in the corner and they can all crash.

But that doesn't work so well with a 21 month old people!!! Do you not see the picture. Not only will she be overstimulated from the people and the pictures and the do this do that stuff...but her normal bedtime is like 7:30 (and she always crashes)...and if she does remain awake past that time it will be mom and dad tending to her, whether or not grandma and grandpa are there, and calming her down, running after her, taking her around to all the tables...just so SIL can think it is "nice" to have her niece at the wedding.

Oh...and do you think she would even notice her there but maybe for a second anyway? With 200 guests to tend to, her new husband to tend to, her cake, her 5 bridesmaids, her family, herself...really??

I don't get why there is such a big deal about all of this. And from both sides. It is like the more we talk about it the more we both start defending our sides of it...and we are at a standstill right now. No one wants to budge.

Our next step...have my mom and her husband RSVP yes, and let the bride/groom pay for the meals, all knowing that they are going to leave before 7pm anyway. Just to get them off our backs and let them think they are getting their way. So, wasted money, but no more wasted energy on this stupid issue.

Arghhhh. It irks me so much that we are still stressing about this very stupid issue. But this is only the icing on the cake...there are little things here and there that have come up about this whole wedding planning thing that just builds this what could be a small issue, up to a huge issue. But those will be saved for another time.

OK...off my back...hopefully it will work itself out. Once the wedding is over (May 30th) so will all the BS that has been going on. And we can all get back to our regularly scheduled lives!!

Isn't that a horrible thing to say? I mean, really, this is supposed to be a wedding, a happy day, a happy time in your life, a new direction and new life!! Haaa...maybe after the "planning" piece is done!!

Hope you all have a good weekend! Enjoy your families.